| so if you know me, i rarely ever blog.
its something that just doesn't ever appeal to me..in ways i don't even remember to.
i feel like my life is sort of like a train wreck right now..or like it will soon become one.
the
feeling of wanting to help someone, but not necessarily knowing how.
and the feeling of loosing everyone that you deeply care about hurts.
it really hurts.
my grandfather recently passed away, less
than a week ago. today was his funeral..it was hard, being there for my
family. i felt like i needed to be strong but i didn't really want to.
i felt like crying my eyes out. honestly, i did, and i felt like i
wasn't as strong as i needed to be. but i wouldn't wish him back for
the world! he's in a wonderful place right now and i honestly think he
would be very mad if we brought him back. he's functioning perfectly
right now. he can see, hear, move, and he has a fully functioning
heart. we were grieving his loss, but we all know that we shouldn't
really be crying because where he is is the best place in the entire
universe, HEAVEN. my pastor said today that we are just passing
through..this is not our home. that we are just traveling through. and
then we will be called home, and it will be amazing. i'm proud of my
grandpa and i'm proud to be a grandchild of him. he was my hero and
will always be. there is NO ONE like my grandpa.
oh boy...the
stress of guys. there's nothing like it! haha..its dramatic. guys are
so amazing, but oh so confusing at the same time.
homecoming is
this coming weekend..i'm sort of scared. i have no idea what to expect.
i hope it goes as well as i had planned, but sometimes life doesn't
ever seem to go the way you want it to go. so i am preparing myself for
something completely different from what i want to happen. because
sometimes what you want and what is actually going to happen are two
completely different things. but i hope, and pray, that that saying is
proven false this weekend. i'm praying. Through God, all things are
possible.
i like dressing up. it makes me feel beautiful :) and sometimes we all just need to feel beautiful. every once in a while.
Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings
You glory And I know there'll
Be days When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to
Praise You Jesus, bring the rain. |
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Have you ever just wondered what your life would be like as a shadow?
I mean, just think about it..
You wouldnt have a say in anything.. you wouldnt have emotions and you wouldnt experience love.
You would just be a figure, a shape.
You may be full of life and full of energy, but without a voice, you wouldnt be anything.
Some of us may be like a shadow, just following along next to somebody, trying to be just like them..
But do you talk? Do you stand up for what YOU personally believe in? or do you just go with the flow, wondering what's gonna happen next.
Waiting for the person you are standing next to to make the decisions for you, to move in the direction you want to go.
But what if the person doesn't think the same as you? or what if the person doesn't want to go in the direction you yourself hoped for and planned for?
Then what?
Are you going to go in that direction, not even listening to your emotions or feelings?
Don't be a shadow.
Living in the shadow of someone else's dreams or goals is a perfect way to just throw your life away, not even thinking that you have the potential of becoming one of the greatest evangelists, preachers, worship leaders, sports performers, scientists, mathematicians, historians.. etc.
Don't be a shadow.
Be your own shadow. Decide for yourself what you want to do, how you want to live your life.
Don't let others decide that for you.
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| Homecoming was amazing.
By far.
|
| |
| (This was written by a guy)
Don't break this....it's so sweet!!!
1. They will always smell good even if it's just shampoo.
2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder.
3. How cute they look when they sleep.
4. The ease in which they fit into our arms .
5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world.
6. How cute they are when they eat.
7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while.
8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside.
9. The way they look good no matter what they wear.
10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on this earth.
11. How cute they are when they argue.
12. The way her hand always finds yours.
13. The way they smile.
14. The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight.
15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later....
16. The way that they kiss after you have had a fight.
17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you".
18. Actually...Just the way they kiss you...
19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry.
20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly.
21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt.
22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it).
23. The way they say "I miss you".
24. The way you miss them.
25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore... Tyler Brown (flip)
Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart.
A feeling.
Only felt.
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| PRAY.
Thank you.
And I know that you are reading this.
And no. I am not mad at you.
I miss you. Come back soon!
taylore |
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